tofallfromgrace.com : the blog

if you have a chance, visit natalie dee

a little bit snarky, a little bit warm & fuzzy. if you’re having a down day, she is almost as good as explodingdog.com or happy bunny/dog of glee.

sunny days at the sundance cafe for memorial day weekend (l to r: jim, dino, dad, chris, jackie o) followed by storm clouds in boulder on tuesday.

suits my mood.

sometimes you have to watch a little dog run…even if it’s around in circles. imagine 180 little dogs at a dog race in denver. bella rocked! she was very tuckered afterward, though…

but late at night, sometimes you gotta dance to the dj…

in this case my cousin, at aqua, this past weekend…

he’ll be there again june 16th and yes, we’ll be there! 9pm, don’t miss it.

unbearably sad.

i was the designated driver tonight.

now stop that! i see your mouth opened wide in a grimace of astonishment.

it has been known to happen that i drive the peeps home safely and soberly. this happened to be one of those nights.

so now, tucked away safely at home, i visit the stagger for a last drink of technology before hitting the soft coziness of my bed, stacking the pillows around me, waiting for the dog to find her comfy spot, drifting off to another world.

being a dd was good for me tonight. not only because i like to make sure people are safe and are able to have a good time (as many people have done for me in the past)…but also because there are times when one’s heart is breaking and their soul is leaden and the tears are being held back only by a brittle veneer of smiles and laughter….those times, it is not such a great time to drink. drinking allows the beast of hopelessness to rear its ugly head; the despair to bubble to the surface until you cannot bear it anymore.

i will take refuge in sleep. i must hope that the melancholy will fade with the night and tomorrow life will be bright again.

okay, seriously, if anyone had said “by the way, when you turn 27 or so, your metabolism is going to take a crapper and by the ripe old age of 30 you’re going to actually join weight watchers”….well, i would have laughed and laughed.

it’s not funny & now that it’s happening, i’m not laughing.

so….drumroll please….175.2 lbs (just for perspective’s sake, when i moved back to colorado two years ago, i was pushing 190…but then again, a year ago i was 165, so i have to seriously maintain).

10% goal: 17 lbs
full goal: 35.2 lbs
final goal weight: 140

am i crazy? am i really going to count my food intake in terms of points? is this what i have come to?

yes, yes it is. now i’m going to go use 3 points on three tablespoons of sugar in my 0 point tea.

“i am not crazy” www.explodingdog.com